Always Build Equity: what you can learn from a Pick-up Artist.
Always Build Equity: what you can learn from a Pick-up Artist.
A year and a half ago, I was a single man. I had just gone through a messy break-up with my seven-and-a-half year girlfriend, lost half of my possessions in the split, and had my ex-partner tell me that he couldn’t pay me money owed for buying me out. It was hard times.
During these times, I turned to one of my buddies that was reknown for his ability to pick up women. He had studied the art of pick-up and could get virtually any girl in the bar. I told him about my hardship and he responded, “Yeah, but what did you learn? What do you know now that you didn’t know then.” His point was that, even in hardship, I was building value. I was building equity in myself.
He went on to tell me that picking up women wasn’t about having a smooth line or a crazy look. It was more about knowing who you were and having ambitions. It was about being in control and being able to adapt to your environment. In a business sense, it was about knowing your business so well that you could pivot on a dime if necessary.
My friend told me the the facade of game was actually a set of very purposeful actions built up over many years. The reason he could talk to everybody in the bar is because he got to know everybody over time, especially the owners. The reason he had such great dinner dates is because he tried all every restaurant to see which was best. He knew about the best places to star-gaze and the best trails to bike on. In a the blink of an eye, he could decide what he wanted and how he wanted to do it. He could do this because he had been building towards this singular goal for years.
This parallels business. In my modest work beginnings, I was shift manager at Pizza Hut. I worked my way up from wait staff, to driver, to manager. The top of the chain wasn’t far away but it didn’t make any sense. Why should I work my butt off towards a glass ceiling? My sweat should be going towards equity in something I owned, not Pizza Hut.
Most people can spend all of their lives working a job they hate because they’re addicted to that bi-weekly paycheck. It’s a sure bet. What they fail to realize is that the house always wins. You can put all the sweat and tears into your job, but you’ll never benefit even close to a 1:1 ratio in terms of effort to success. However, safety is a big motivator and if I had a house payment and kids, I wouldn’t want to risk it either…
No matter what your situation, the best way to look at it is to ask yourself, “What did I learn?” If you can extrapolate that, then you’re already building equity in yourself.
-Brian Lambelet
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-JP